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یہ صفحہ اردو میں بھی موجود ہے۔ زبان کی تبدیلی کے لیے نیچے بٹن دبائیں۔
Question:
Assalamu Alaikum! I am a 24-year-old medical professional and seek clarification on a very personal and religious issue. Since childhood, I have naturally felt a persistent attraction towards women. I grew up in a strict household where I had no access to the internet, TV, or media; therefore, I had no knowledge of terms like LGBTQ+. I tried to conform to societal expectations and redirect my feelings towards men, but over time, my inner state and inclination towards women became clearer and more intense instead of diminishing.
Since I am a medical student/professional, I also view this issue from a scientific angle. According to research, sexual orientation may be linked to certain biological factors, such as the structure of certain parts of the brain, like the amygdala, and the effects of hormones in the womb, such as testosterone. Statistics show that approximately 1 to 4 percent of any population has non-traditional/non-heterosexual orientations, suggesting this is a form of human natural diversity.
I have been struggling with these feelings for over ten years, which I consider an internal jihad against my own self. I have remained chaste for 24 years and am committed to my faith. My psychiatrist, who is also a believer, said that Allah created me with this condition and that Allah alone is the final judge of His creation. “Conversion therapy,” i.e., forcibly trying to change sexual orientation, is not only scientifically considered unreliable but has also caused me severe mental trauma. The thought of being forced into a relationship or marriage with a man feels as painful and aggressive as rape.
My Questions for Religious Guidance
- Scriptural Evidence: Is there any explicit evidence in the Quran or authentic Hadith regarding the prohibition of sexual relations between women, i.e., lesbianism? Since the Quranic story of the people of Lot (peace be upon him) pertains to the act between men, is there any clear text regarding the relationship between women that declares it forbidden?
- Living and Cohabitation: Since marrying a man is psychologically and physically impossible for me, is it permissible for me to live with a Muslim female partner/companion?
- Nature and Sin: If, according to science, this inclination can be innate or biological, how does Islamic belief explain how something naturally found in a human can be an inclination towards sin?
I love my Creator and want to remain within the fold of Islam, while also wanting a life that is psychologically bearable. I request that the answer consider both the medical realities of human psychology and the mercy and compassion of the religion of Islam. Jazakum Allahu Khairan
بِاسْمِ اللہِ سُبْحَانَہٗ وَتَعَالٰی، الَّذِیْ عَلَّمَ الْإِنْسَانَ مَعَالِمَ الدِّیْنِ، وَأَنْعَمَ عَلَیْہِ بِحَقَائِقِ الشَّرِیْعَةِ وَالتَّمْکِیْنِ
Summary of Answer
According to Hanafi fiqh and general Sunni jurisprudence, a lustful/sexual relationship between a woman and another woman, termed in juristic terminology as sihaq, is impermissible and forbidden (haram). However, an involuntary inclination, inner attraction, or whisper (waswasa) is not in itself a sin as long as one does not translate it into action, invitation, a romantic/sexual relationship, or intentional nurturing. The Shariah ruling applies to action, not to mere involuntary feelings. In Sahih al-Bukhari 6664, it is stated that Allah has pardoned the thoughts that occur in the hearts of this Ummah as long as they are not acted upon or given a verbal/practical form.
At the same time, forcing an adult woman into marriage with a man she is not agreeable to, or whose rights she cannot fulfill, is not correct according to Shariah. In Hanafi fatwas, a marriage without the consent of a sane, adult woman is not considered valid, or at least it is deemed conditional upon her permission.
Is there Evidence in the Quran or Authentic Hadith for the Prohibition of Sexual Relations Between Women?
The Quranic account of the people of Lot (peace be upon him) specifically mentions the lustful act of men with men, as in Surah al-A’raf 7:80-81 where it is called a “fahishah” (abomination) and transgression. However, the ruling on sexual relations between women is not limited to the story of the people of Lot; rather, the general principle of the Quran makes it clear that the permissible path for sexual gratification is between husband and wife within the bounds of marriage; any path besides this is “transgression.” In Surah al-Mu’minun 23:5-7, the characteristic of the believers is described that they guard their private parts, except from their spouses; then it is said فَمَنِ ابۡتَغٰى وَرَآءَ ذٰ لِكَ فَاُولٰٓٮِٕكَ هُمُ الۡعٰدُوۡنَ ۚ ٧ that whoever seeks beyond that, then it is those who are the transgressors.
In authentic hadith, there is also prohibition regarding women uncovering their private parts before other women and physical intimacy. In Sahih Muslim, it is stated that a woman should not look at the private parts of another woman, and two women should not lie under one cloth.
In Sahih al-Bukhari, a woman is also prohibited from looking at or touching the body of another woman in a manner that she would then describe it to her husband. When a woman is prohibited from looking at the private parts of another woman and from lustful physical proximity, then sexual relations between women are prohibited with greater reason (bi al-awla). Because preventing a lesser evil in the Quran and Sunnah inherently includes preventing a greater evil.
In the fatwas of contemporary scholars and muftis, sexual relations between women are explicitly declared forbidden (haram) and سحاق النساء زنا بینھن is cited as a hadith, meaning “women squeezing each other (out of lust) is their fornication among themselves.”
In Maktabah Shamilah, under Mawsua’ al-Ijma’ fi al-Fiqh al-Islami, both rulings “السحاق حرام and “لا حد في السحاق” are recorded; meaning sihaq (i.e., sexual relations between women) is haram, but it does not carry the prescribed fixed punishment (hadd) of zina; rather, the Qadhi of an Islamic state may punish it as a discretionary punishment (ta’zir) for deterrence. Similarly, in Fiqh al-Sunnah, it is also narrated that “السحاق محرم باتفاق العلماء , meaning sihaq is forbidden by unanimous agreement of scholars.
Conclusion: There is no separate verse in the Quran explicitly naming the act between women, but based on the general principles of the Quran, authentic hadiths, narrations (athar), juristic consensus (ijma), and the fatwas of Hanafi Dar al-Ifta, a lustful/sexual relationship between a woman and another woman is forbidden (haram).
Is it Permissible to Live with a Muslim Female Partner/Companion?
Here it is important to distinguish between two scenarios:
1. If “Partner” implies a Romantic or Sexual Relationship
Such a relationship is not permissible; whether both women are Muslims, have mutual consent, or it is called marriage/partnership. In Shariah, marriage (nikah) is between a man and a woman; marriage or sexual companionship between a woman and a woman is not considered valid. In a fatwa from Banuri Town, homosexuality, whether through man-man or woman-woman relations for fulfilling desires, is declared impermissible and forbidden (haram).
2. If “Companion” implies a Non-Sexual, Non-Romantic, Safe Residential Partner
In general circumstances, a woman living with another woman, having friendship, seeking help, building a support system, or sharing a house is not inherently impermissible. However, for a person known to have a lustful attraction, it is obligatory to avoid seclusion (khalwah), romantic proximity, touching, sharing a bed, emotional attachment, or any environment that leads to a strong possibility of sin. To avoid such sin, one is particularly instructed to stay away from the person with whom one has such a trial. The rulings for other women do not change because a particular woman has such inclinations, but responding to sexual or intimate advances is impermissible, and maintaining boundaries along with support is necessary.
Conclusion:
- Living with a Muslim woman as a “romantic/sexual partner” is not permissible.
- A non-sexual, modest, safe female roommate or companion may be permissible in principle, provided that one avoids lust, fitna (temptation), touching, lustful seclusion (khalwah shahwaniyyah), nudity, romantic attachment, and the causes of sin.
- One should avoid living alone or having a “partner-like” relationship with a woman towards whom one has a particular attraction.
If the Inclination Towards the Same Sex is Innate or Biological, How is it Sinful?
In Islam, not every involuntary inclination is a sin. Sin occurs when a person commits a forbidden act, considers a forbidden act permissible, or deliberately adopts the means leading to sin. According to the hadith in Sahih al-Bukhari, thoughts that occur in the heart are pardoned as long as one does not act upon them or express them verbally or practically. Similarly, the Quran states that Allah does not burden a soul beyond its capacity.
Therefore, if a woman truly feels an involuntary attraction towards women, she does not become sinful, accursed, or distant from Allah merely because of this attraction. Her chastity, patience, prayer, supplication, treatment, caution, and struggle to avoid the forbidden are very valuable in the sight of Allah. If same-sex feelings are not acted upon (i.e., one does not derive pleasure from these thoughts inwardly or establish a relationship with a same-sex person, etc.), then mere thoughts in themselves are not sin.
Science or medical diagnosis and the Shariah ruling are two separate domains. The fact that an inclination is not a “psychological illness” does not necessitate that every action based on that inclination becomes permissible. For example, anger, jealousy, lust, revenge, or attraction towards a non-mahram are also natural/human experiences, but Shariah commands humans to keep these emotions within permissible limits. In this issue as well, Shariah passes a ruling on action, relationship, and transgression of limits, not on the inclination itself.
Is Every Woman Obligated to Marry a Man? And The Ruling on Forced Marriage
It is not obligatory upon the questioner to marry a man merely due to societal pressure, especially if she is certain that she cannot fulfill marital rights or that marriage would cause her severe psychological harm. According to Hanafi fatwas, a sane, adult boy or girl cannot be forced into marriage; the fatwas explicitly state that a sane, adult boy and girl perform marriage with their free consent; they cannot be forced to marry someone. In a fatwa from Banuri Town, it is detailed that a marriage without the consent of a sane, adult woman is not valid or is conditional upon her permission.
Therefore, the Shariah path for the questioner is to remain engaged in chastity, prayer, supplication, and to live life with continuous guidance from a female scholar (alimah), a mufti, or a reputable Dar al-Ifta. Marriage to a man should only be considered if it is freely chosen, honestly possible, and psychologically feasible; marrying a man by deceiving him or by subjecting oneself to severe mental anguish is not the correct way.
Practical Guidance
- Keep your faith as your primary foundation; your relationship with Allah is your greatest refuge.
- Do not hate yourself by considering mere inclination as a sin; view avoiding sin as worship and patience.
- Avoid romantic/sexual intimacy, private closeness, continuous emotional dependency, and lustful conversations with a particular woman.
- If a slip occurs, do not despair; the Quran says do not despair of Allah’s mercy; Allah can forgive all sins.
- Establish a continuous reformative connection with a pious elder (Allah wale buzurg) and keep consulting them.
- Changing one’s gender is not permissible, but if someone has medical issues within their own gender, treating it is correct and encouraged. Therefore, if possible, continue to seek treatment for yourself as well.
May Allah, the Lord of Might, make things easy and convenient for you. And may He always grant you a pure, clean life of contentment and peace, far from sins.
Ameen, Thumma Ameen, Ya Rabb al-Alameen
وَاللہُ بِالصَّوَابِ أَعْلَمُ، وَعِلْمُہُ أَصْوَبُ وَأَتَمُّ